Are those your body issues…Or, your moms?

Posted on May 7, 2013 by kenetia

My mom in every way has influenced just about every aspect of my life. She taught me how to speak up for myself, ask for what I want and be persistent. Along with all of her kick-ass character traits she also instilled in me some of her neurosis.

She taught me that my appearance matters and I should always dress appropriate for the occasion. To this day I would not be caught dead wearing a wrinkled shirt or God forbid have strings hanging from your skirt. I also picked up on many of her subtle self-belittling comments she would have with herself in front of the mirror. She was always on a diet, finishing a diet or about to start a diet. Her weight was a major point of contention and she never seemed to be happy with her body no matter what her weight was.

Before I started my journey of self-acceptance I would always be very critical of my body and although I’ve never been overweight. I have been at times overly concerned with my appearance to the point I would show up late for very important meetings because something seemed out of place. Or, I have refused to wear shorts in 100 degree weather because I could see a dimple or two in the meaty part of my thigh.

You too have likely picked up a thing or two about your body from your mother that has you a little or a lot concerned with your appearance. Your mother may have planted those self-critical seeds in your head, but there is no need for you to keep tending to that garden if it is not making you feel confident about your body.

Body confidence starts with forgiveness. Meaning, letting go of all those thoughts about your body that doesn’t support you feeling good about your body. Do a body check in the mirror and as you scan different parts of your body be aware if that little voice in your head. Is it your own or your mother’s? If it is your mother’s and it is not positive, first thank that little voice for sharing and declare you are ready to start a new internal dialogue.

This mother’s day be sure to thank your mother for all the wonderful gifts she has given you and share with her some of the positive declarations you have made for yourself around your body. It just might inspire a whole new level of body confidence in her!!!

Fearless Friday: The power of one story can heal your past ~ Conversations with my Dad

Posted on December 7, 2012 by kenetia

It is not uncommon for my Dad to call me up out of the blue these days since I took steps to mend our stranded relationship some time ago. So seeing his name pop up on my caller ID this Wednesday in the middle of the afternoon wasn’t a surprise, but I was truly shocked by his eagerness to be heard.

Last week I sent my Mom a few copies of my book to give away or sell to her clients and put an extra one in there just for her to read. Turns out that extra copy found its way into my father’s hands. If you have been following my blog for any amount of time you know that the core of my message is about healing those stories from your past that keep you from recognizing your inherent beauty and potential. To illustrate this point in Fearless Beauty I revealed a really painful event from my childhood that involved both of my parents which I had been holding on to for years until I took the steps to forgive my father.

The beginning of the conversation went a little bit like this, “Hey Dad! How are you?” My dad responded, “Oh, I’m doing good. You know I’ve been reading your book and I’ve made it to chapter four where you start to talk about me and your mother’s relationship.” My heart literally stopped and I really didn’t have an opportunity to respond because he hardly took a breathe before continuing with his thoughts. He said, “You know there is always two sided to every story, but I never realized how much I really affected you. We were young, you know and I was only 18 when I met your mother. I guess you are right that everyone has a history or herstory, because you wouldn’t believe the pain that I experienced having my mother pass away when I was only 13. I thought God had forsaken me.” As my dad continued to pour out his heart to me, I sat silently weeping on the other end of the phone, because I knew in that moment a healing of my dad’s past was taking place.

He continued to share with me, why he never wanted to have another child, because he couldn’t imagine loving someone as much as he loved me. Turns out I am the spitting image of my grandmother a woman who I’ve never met. “There is so much you don’t know about me,” he exclaimed. Our conversation went on for a while, but it ended with me saying, “Dad I don’t blame you for anything that happened, I’ve learned to take responsibility for my own life and my emotions. Just keep reading I think you will enjoy the healing you provided me that I couldn’t have done without you.”

It is amazing the transformation that one story can bring about in another persons life. Yet, I’m finding more and more people are less inclined to explore and reveal the very essence of their existence by telling their story. I’m not suggesting that everyone go out and write a book revealing all their dirty laundry for the world to see, but the sheer act of putting your thoughts to paper really is the cheapest form of therapy known to man. Journal writing is how I started healing the wounds from my past, which has brought me a sense of awareness that who I am is enough.

Take some time this weekend to put some of your thoughts to paper. If you want some good journal exercises to help you weed through some of the pain or resentment you may be holding onto from your past, buy my book Fearless Beauty by clicking this link http://tinyurl.com/cg7fs87

Sensa Breast Self-Exam Glove

Posted on October 23, 2012 by kenetia

This little beauty product can potential save your life. Since I decided to launch my book release in conjunction with Breast Cancer Awareness month I’ve learned so much about caring for my breast and the importance of giving myself breast exams. So, I’m passing some of that knowledge on to you.

Today’s product of the week is the Sensa Breast Self-Exam Glove. This unique breast self exam tool is designed to educate women on how to perform self-exams while facilitating their ability to do so.

“Early detection and diagnosis of breast cancer still remains a woman’s
best defense,” says Neil B. Friedman, M.D., Director of The Hoffberger
Breast Center at Mercy Medical Center in Baltimore.

If you are not familiar with how to give yourself a breast exam please visit http://www.webmd.com/breast-cancer/guide/breast-self-exam . I hear from many survivors that giving yourself breast exams often is the key to early detection, so that you become familiar with how your breast feel and you can determine what is normal and what is not.

Makeover Monday: Do better today, and fix less tomorrow

Posted on October 22, 2012 by kenetia

Could our focus on breast cancer be the very thing killing us? I pray you don’t think I’m being flip in my inquiry, because it truly is an inquiry that popped into my mind the moment I finished meditating one day last week. Last week I spent a lot of time with breast cancer survivors listening to their stories and all of them were so educated on what they needed to do to prevent the disease from coming back again. All of them were making sure that I knew how to protect and keep my breasts healthy as well.

In my book Fearless Beauty I teach my readers to focus on what they love about their appearance so that what they do not like will take a back seat by default. What is commonly called “mind over matter,” or “law of attraction.” I’ll be the first to admit this isn’t always an easy concept to apply when it comes to the physical body—especially if you experience your body acting in a way that is abnormal to you. For example, when you get a pimple on your face (please know I’m not comparing breast cancer to a pimple, this is just an example), all you see when you look in the mirror is that pimple, right? Then, all of a sudden, it gets bigger or others pop up all around it.

When we focus our thoughts on the problem, in this case the pimple, we tend to experience more of the problem. I personally don’t believe this happens just by chance. Our attention and thoughts are very powerful magnets that attract what we think about most. The more energy and attention we give something, the faster we will attract it.

“Offer a vibration that matches your desire rather than offering a vibration that keeps matching what-is.” Abraham Hicks

While it may seem as if wishing that your pimples will go away might actually help them go away, placing such a large amount of attention on your pimples increases the likelihood of more pimples. Conversely, if you focus on clear, healthy skin, you will inevitably attract, seek out and find ways to have healthy, clear skin.

In my soul I believe it is possible to lower the rate of women getting breast cancer. Join me in focusing on keeping our bodies and breast healthy. Let us focus on learning what foods, habits, products and activities truly support us in our well-being.

Check out our Fearless Beauty’s next Breast Cancer Fundraiser click here.

Fearless Friday: When was the last time you had a First?

Posted on October 19, 2012 by kenetia

When was the last time you had a first? I’m talking about the kind of first that is so memorable that every time you think about it a smile comes to your face. Like the first time you learned how to ride a bike, the first time you had a kiss or the first time you got behind the wheel of a car. Why does it seem like the older we get, firsts tend to come far and few between? Or, are we just so jaded about life by the time we hit our mid twenties that we don’t take time to appreciate our firsts in the same way we use to when we were young?

This week has been full of first times for me. On Monday, I had my very first book reading in Chicago.

Thank you Heather for hosting this event at Glam Luxe.

Then on Tuesday I did my very first appearance for my book on television.

And today, is the first time that I’ve held my book in my hands.

If I were 9 my mom would have planned a big party, invited all of my family and friends over to celebrate and cooked my favorite meal. This was my mom’s way of teaching me to acknowledge my accomplishments and celebrate life. Even though I don’t have any big productions being planned to celebrate these firsts, I’m reminded by all the women I met this week that either went through or are going through breast cancer, that every moment is precious and deserves to be celebrated. This Fearless Friday I challenge you to create a memorable first for yourself and celebrate in some small or big way one of the many accomplishments I’m certain you have overlooked.

Check out our Fearless Beauty’s next Breast Cancer Fundraiser click here.

BOOM

Posted on July 24, 2012 by kenetia

Yes, that’s the name of a new cosmetic line and get this ladies… it’s the FIRST makeup line to promote Pro-Age instead of Anti-Aging. I don’t know about you but this excites me! It’s about time we stopped trying to hault the aging process and get on with celebrating aging as a privilege.

The creator is a veteran makeup artist turned supermodel, gracing campaign ads like Dolce & Gabana, Garnier, Olay and Target. And she didn’t have to lose weight or die her grey hair to do it. She firmly believes that, “Trying to hide our age makes us look desperate.” Amen!!

It’s a simple line with just 3 BOOMsticks. A highlighter, moisturizer and a powerful color stick that matches every skin, used for cheeks, lips, eyeshadow, and more. Mine is on the way, I’ll let you know it really matches every skin tone.

Check out the BOOM collection.

So, ladies are you ready for this revolution of Pro-Age or are you happy chasing Anti-Aging solutions?

Protected: What would YOU Do for FREE?

Posted on June 22, 2012 by kenetia

How to Quiet Your Inner Critic

Posted on June 14, 2012 by kenetia

Before I learned to meditate, my mind would always be racing, thinking, wondering, figuring out ways to get over some sort of anxiety I had. My feelings and thoughts about myself would range from am I good enough, pretty enough, do I know enough, will I look like a fool or am I capable of achieving my dreams — like writing a book or becoming a public speaker. All things I know many women worry about given the hundreds conversations I have had with women sitting in my makeup chair over the years. These self-defeating conversations are rampant in women’s minds regardless of her physical beauty, talents or intelligence.

My first introduction to meditation was about six years ago on a retreat I attended in Carlsbad, CA. I sought out this retreat after a series of unfortunate events being hospitalized, losing my only source of income and my recent separation from my husband of seven years. Between all of this and my constant self battery I lost all confidence in myself. The retreat was temporary, but the gift of learning to meditate continues to build my self-esteem.

In my first lesson of meditation, I felt quite silly, sitting in a circle with a group of people, doing absolutely nothing; my mind raced about 1,000 miles a minute. Every few minutes, I would open my eyes, peek at the other people and wonder if they were looking at me, too! After a few days of meditation, my mind chatter slowed down and I started to enjoy myself. By the time I left the retreat, I was determined to make meditation part of my daily life. Something that I strongly recommend any one do that wants to feel more confident in their own skin.

The effects of meditation on your body, mind and spirit are expansive, so much so that there are whole sections in bookstores dedicated to this subject. Of all the information that I’ve read and studied, my own experience with the practice has been my greatest teacher. I’ve learned to accept my imperfect perfections, forgive myself and others and, best of all, love the little girl within me and the woman whom she continues to become.

Meditation won’t make your nose smaller or your lips more pouty—at least I don’t think it will!—but it has a real impact on the way you feel about yourself. Regular meditation leads to calmness, inner peace and lower stress levels. If you are curious about meditation and want to explore it for yourself download my FREE 30-Minute guided meditation and I’ll continue to send you tips on cultivating a beauty ritual that helps not only look good, but feel good too.

Kenetia’s Blog

Posted on March 31, 2012 by kenetia

If you missed last nights Miss USA Pageant on NBC below is a quick clip of that intense moment where Miss Rhode Island was crowned Miss USA 2012. Now that I live with the beauty queens of the Miss Universe Organization as the apartment manager my interest in who is crowd was extremely heightened.

Olivia Culpo, now Miss USA is a cello player who has frequently seen her name on the Dean’s list at Boston College and it goes without saying she is beautiful. I know not everyone is a fan of beauty pageants, but I’ve come to love it since that faithful day seven years ago when Covergirl who use to be a sponsor hired me to be the lead makeup artist for the Miss Universe pageant.

CLICK HERE IS WATCH VIDEO

Most of the contestants I’ve met really are more then beautiful faces with incredible bodies they are smart, caring and endearing women who really make a difference. It’s unfortunate that reality television like toddlers and tiara’s and some others vocal public opinion about the pageant world has painted this extremely bad picture of what these girls are about. Pageantry at this level is about so much more evident in the recent 2012 Miss USA selection and this quote that I picked up from last night show. “Confidence is the most attractive quality a woman can possess.”

Congratulations, Miss Olivia Culpo!

Timeless Beauty

Posted on January 27, 2012 by kenetia

How to have self confidence

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